Jayapataka Swami: You see it depends on one’s nature. In the 8th canto of the Śrīmad Bhāgavatam, there is fight between the king of the elephants and the king of the crocodiles. So the fight was in the water. At one point, the elephant felt that he was losing. Because he is a land animal, and he was in the water. But the crocodile is a water animal. So somehow or another he was in his elements, so he was stronger. In the purport Śrīla Prabhupāda says that we should see what is our nature. That in every situation, we want to fight against māyā. So, if your nature is more vairāgya, then you can be a brahmacārī for a long time. If your nature is more gṛhastha, then you may be in that āśrama. But then it is important to have a devotee wife. So that both of you can fight against māyā as a team, to serve Kṛṣṇa. If the lady is simply māyā, then that will not be very convenient. It is very important to marry a Kṛṣṇa conscious lady, if you want to have a gṛhasta āśrama. Of course, having a household means you have to work. Unless you have a service at the temple, you have to spend some time earning money. So it is little more of a balancing act. Being a brahmacārī has certain advantages – you don’t have these responsibilities. But again you have to see what your nature is. If your nature is such that you have to be a gṛhastha, then you should try to find a devotee mate. See how you can do your devotional service together. Unfortunately, people when they look for a mate, they look for a nice face! But actually, you have to deal with the mind. So you should see that they are Kṛṣṇa conscious. One boy, he married a non-devotee, he was asked by his parents. She was a non-veg, but she promised I will be a vegetarian. After they had a baby, she started eating chicken. Then he said, you promised you will be a vegetarian! She said, I promised, I tried, I was a vegetarian for a year. You know what background I came from – sorry, I have to eat meat! So, better to have a devotee from the beginning. So at least there is less maintenance. Marriage is two people. You have to have the other person on the same wavelength. As brahmacārīs, when you are staying in the āśrama, there are some crazy people also. So there are ups and downs in both sides. Brahmacārīs, you don’t have responsibilities, so you can serve Kṛṣṇa 24 hours. But gṛhasthas can also do a lot of service. So if they make money, they can give some money to the temple. Or they can do various preaching. We want people to serve Kṛṣṇa, no matter what they are.
18-Nov-2020 ŚRĪ MĀYĀPUR DHAM, INDIA